The decade 2001 – 2010 that I'm about to close in few hours, was full of personal growth; emotional ups and downs; career change; madness of marriage to craziness of divorce; leaving India for the US; a decade of accepting empowerment; to learn new things, to find new hopes, to build new life; a decade a decade truly full of life, full of ‘myself’ - thank you 2001 - 2010.
Hoping a balanced life, a steady career and a personal stable growth in years to come!
Trojan
It was a cold morning and I was given a shock, not because it was cold morning but because it was a day full of shocks...And I had no idea how and what to say. I didn’t know how to react when I was told that my field instructor was let go from his job. His job was my internship. In normal case scenario, it shouldn't make a difference but it makes a huge difference in my case.
After hours and hours of shock, I am still in shocked mode…oh so I started my internship later than other USC Social Work students. I was promised that I will have a good internship and it will help me grow as an MSW. I stayed at my internship for couple of months but not as an intern but as a girl who acted like an intern but was an observant. I observed what was happening, what was missing, what was needed and what could have been possible, but....but I was mere an observant so I didn't say a word. And today when I was about to meet my field instructor, I was told he is gone which means my one and only chance to move up from an observant to a case worker, or a therapist or a counselor was dead before it even took a shape, it was born...
As a result, I spoke with my seminar professor but the issue remained unsolved until he finds out what is plausible and how to fit us (oh the fun is I am not all alone) in everything. Seriously I will be real mad if they won't let me Graduate because my internship was messed up...ah! Life you never tend to stop surprising me. I love my life and its changes, my life and its surprises – oh dear life, your surprises and changes are not new to me dear...I know you from ages, from my old days!
Oh I will get over you harsh time, I will win over you, One day I will !!!
Trojan
Human Behavior - check,
Policy - check,
Practice - check,
Field Practicum - check
One month long winter break - PRICELESS ♥
Yes, I did it. I finished all my papers and I am free now. This semester has ended successfully and nothing like this feeling. The best part if that I finished it two days before my deadline..woohoo! Now its time for one month of relaxation!The Thanksgiving break is about to get over in some hours. Today is Sunday and I am sitting in my living room writing this blog while my final papers and how to do what about them goes at the back of my mind.
This Thanksgiving break was THE MOST RELAXING TIME I had since the day I started USC and since the day I moved into this new apartment. My roommate left on Tuesday for his parents’ house and I took a breath of relief. No, I don’t hate him but I do not like his few hygienic habits and his cleanliness. I cleaned the whole house by myself on Wednesday. My place was filthy as hell (or whatever that means). The clean place made me feel so much better. I was happy to look at my room, living room, kitchen and bathroom…and wasn’t hiding in the corner of my room to avoid the unclean areas of my apartment.
Anyways, after I cleaned I turn the heat on, brought my laptop and related stuff in living room, and finally enjoyed this living room which I have been paying for few monthsJ. These four days, from Wednesday to Saturday, I relaxed, wrote a little bit of my final papers, watched a movie and just chilled. I know that I could have finish couple of my final papers but I did some parts of those but not the whole thing. This whole fun included some food and some laughter and no alcohol. I didn’t need alcohol or sex or whatever to make me feel good…the cleanliness and calmness of my place was enough to get high on lol
Today when I woke up and realized it is Sunday, which means my roommate is going to come back and I will have to live in filthy place once again :-). I wish I can just tell him, "Please just clean after yourself every time, and scrub dishes with soap and then wash, and this way you don’t have to clean all the time." But I won’t say it because I am not his mom, sister or whatever... I know in weirdness of all this often I leave my dished unwashed but during this break, every single time I cleaned my dishes without any thought…and how relaxing was that, ah! This all reminded me of one proverb from India, “even a dog cleans the place he sits at, and then why can’t humans do the same.”
Oh well, I relaxed these few days and had most amazing time by myself. Now it’s time to get back to my papers and use this relaxed mind and body for finals :-)))).
Trojan
Thursday, November 11, 2010, I went to see a doctor at the school for my ongoing stupid stomach issues...I don't think it is some big issue but since I have a health insurance, I thought I can check with doctor for free and I did but the blood tests went free, ah! Doctor informed me that I might have thyroid because my mom has it or maybe I need to control my diet and eat more "healthy food" or maybe I need to work out on regular basis…oh well!!! I was told to take expensive blood test which I did and two days later I got an email from doctor stating nothing is wrong with my body; I just need 20 minutes walk and a lot of fiber…Duh!! Wasted my money lol
Okay, fine the fun part aside, I am getting into serious topic now. I wrote about the dilemma I was facing couple of days ago, so I went to see my other professor, no not the HB professor who had put me into this dilemma. My other professor, who is my academic advisor as well suggested that I should email my HB professor and try to speak with him and I should get things sorted out and if my HB professor doesn’t respond to me properly or refuses to give explanation for cutting my so many points, then my other professor will step in to advocate on my behalf. I truly believe that it could have worked but it might still hurt my final grades, and my grades for my quiz, which is within a week.
After giving a deep thought and after paying close attention to my NEEDS to pass this class with good grades, I planned to let go. Though I am all about social justice, but here my rights weren’t denied, I chose to step back because I am afraid I might lose my status of A grades in the class or I might get more hurt emotionally, and I can’t afford to do that to myself. I have finals coming up and I need to move on.
I am still going to write an email or a letter as anonymous or maybe with my name to the dean and will cc it to student affairs and present the issues BUT after the final results are posted online and when it is public. I will not take same professor’s class, and will continue to work towards my goals.
Life is what happens to all of us on daily basis not what is gone by!
Trojan
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